went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
