At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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