I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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