my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
