Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
