I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Randomize
