these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize