Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
