he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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