Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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