Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
