My room smells like vodka and shame
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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