i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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