she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize
