Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
