no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize