We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
