How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Randomize
