So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
