there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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