Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
