I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
