who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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