Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
