So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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