she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
honey bunches of taint.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
His hands were made for my vagina.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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