there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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