i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
