think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize