I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
