More tranny stories later!
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
