I want to make a zoo with you.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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