how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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