idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Randomize