suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
