Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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