one might say we're banned from that church
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
