How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
