I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
