didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
