bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
