So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
