The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize