I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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