i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
