You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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