I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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