I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?