Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
