Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Rumble strips road head = magical
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
