Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
