i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
